Find Comfort in Your Own Skin

On many occasions I have watched people in meetings, forums and at parties, dinners and conferences etc and been amazed at how comfortable some people appear and how easy these people are to be around ... and then how uncomfortable some people appear and how these people jsut aren't so easy to be around.  I have come to talk about this as how comfortable people are (or aren't as the case may be!) in their own.

It came back in to focus for me this week when I received an email from a colleague who I think sums this up beautifully.  She writes....
"Who are You?"
Truly confident people have already worked out who they are and what they stand for, and more importantly - what they will not stand for. Their personal constitution has already been written adn ratified so there is no need for pretense in any given situation.  There is very little "gap" between the public and private self.  They trust in themselves.  Confident people don't always need to be right, because deep down, they already live by their own moral code.  Similarly, confident people have no need to draw attention to themselves because they aren't particularly interested in what others think. They are too busy getting on with their own stuff.

And so the question everyone is likely to ask is so how do we set our own moral code and develop the confidence of those who have theirs already set?  These are great questions and here are a few tips that just might help...

Accept Yourself 
This is where confidence starts.  We were all born with gifts and all our gifts are different. Sure there are bits about us we don't necessarily love and even some things in our past and some decisions that we are not too proud of.  But these are the things that make us who we are.  We need to accept ourselves for who we are.  We are not perfect and nor will we ever be, so let's be confident with what we have.

Own it      
Own who you are.  No matter where you are in life, you have assets and positive strengths that you can and must own.  These are what make you great. You are valuable for who you are and the talents you have.

Stretch
We all seem more comfortable living inside our comfort zones, confidence comes when our comfort zones are stretched.  In fact once our comfort zones are stretched they never ever come back to their original size and the best part is our confidence grows and expands with it. So take a chance, learn something new and you will feel and see your acceptance of you and your world and hence your confidence grow.

Move
Healthy self esteem starts with caring for yourself and there is no better way to acheive this than with some sort of exercise or movement regime.  Daily exercise builds momemtum for a great day.  Try it!

So, it all starts from the inside out - it's an inside job!  Deep down inside and in some - very deep - tehre is a well of self esteem that knows exactly who we are and what we are all about.  It's not about the material things in our lives, its about confidence and honouring your own value and sense of self and developing an unshakeable trust in yourself.